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First Brexit, then Trump, and now, behold the smart hairbrush

Mark Walton
The Kérastase/L'Oreal/Withings smart hairbrush.
As the clock struck midnight on December 31, the year 2016 finally came to an end. There was a hope—after the great political rift created by Brexit, the uncharted territory of president elect Donald Trump, and the deaths of numerous beloved celebrities, to name but a few of 2016's horrors—that 2017 would be a far more positive affair.
Instead, 2017 has brought with it the introduction of the smart hairbrush. Yes, my friends, no longer must you go without instantaneous feedback on hair pull, frizziness, and brushing patterns via the joys of an iOS or Android companion app as you brush your hair. So many sleepless nights, now saved thanks to L'Oreal and perpetual IoT-tinkerer Withings.
Take a moment and ponder its miraculous nature: now, instead of just brushing your hair with a non-rechargeable pauper's brush, a microphone can listen to the sound of bristles running over hair follicles, while a gyroscope can monitor whether you lack the precision of a fine salon-trained hand. There's even a conductivity sensor to determine just how wet or dry your hair is while your brush it.
And as that data is captured and crunched alongside local weather information for styling tips—with recommendations for L'Oreal products, of course—you can rest easy, safe in the knowledge that the $200/£200 you spent on a smart brush will soon be rendered worthless as society collapses under the weight of its own extravagance.
Welcome to 2017. It's only going to get worse.
First Brexit, then Trump, and now, behold the smart hairbrush Reviewed by Chidinma C Amadi on 6:52 PM Rating: 5

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